I went shopping yesterday for a replacement hairbrush since my last one cracked. I also bought a new wooden spoon that in no way could be confused with one from the kitchen. I told Hubby that I really needed a long, hard "vacation" and he was happy to comply. As long as the spanking is sexual in nature, and a pleasurable experience, he is willing to give it a go.
I asked him to tell me what implement he was using so I could judge the pain levels for future reference. He spanked me for about 30 minutes and toward the end I was thrashing about as he was holding me down. He did really well. I'm very proud of him for sticking it out as long as he did. We kept checking in with each other. He wanted to know on a scale of 1 to 10 how I was feeling. I would in turn ask him how he was feeling, making sure that the experience isn't too much for him.
In between series of swats, he massaged my burning bottom, occasionally fingering me or inserting our favorite new toy (a vibrator with bumps and ribs) before starting again. His favorite implements? The new hairbrush and spoon of course! I don't know how many swats I received. I couldn't count them. I was trying to experience the pleasure in the pain. I was also trying to figure out what "sub space" is, but I couldn't find it. The pain kept me very present.
What started off as stinging pain that faded into a warm feeling all over my bottom, ended up as peaks of pain I can't quite explain, that, when he was finished with each round of spanks, turned into numbness. He kissed my glowing bottom several times and his whiskers poked at me, giving me an entirely new sensation. The spanks became more and more painful, almost intolerable. I couldn't see how anyone would ever get to that place of serenity and become limp.
Maybe it's because this wasn't a punishment, so my head wasn't in the right place to accept the pain as such, and therefore it hurt in just a physical way instead of emotional as well? Do you only experience "sub space" when your emotions are at a particular place? Can I experience it when it's meant to be a pleasurable spanking? If so, how?
Because there was no emotional release, I don't feel light as a feather today. I feel my sore bottom every time I sit. Don't get me wrong, that has a pleasure all it's own because it reminds me of last night and the gift my lover gave to me. But I would love to find that space or release I crave. Any suggestions?
As for my new friends, the hairbrush and the spoon, I would say that I prefer the hairbrush. It definitely provided more sting. The spoon was a deeper kind of pain. Don't get me wrong. I liked it too. Of course now I'm considering other implements, ones that would have to be purchased from a specialty store; a real paddle and a strap. Or maybe not... If Hubby ever does get it in his mind to punish me with a spanking, I just may regret it. He knows where the sit spot is and he spends most of his time there.
Is it weird that after last night's spanking, and the bruising I have this morning, that I want more? I feel a bit insatiable right now. But I'm definitely not sitting pretty. I gots me some sore buns this morning!