Monday, August 27, 2012

I Need Your Help Please

I really need some help, some advice, some direction if you will. You see, this Friday is my 10th anniversary and I want to rewrite my vows to Hubby as a gift. My original vows were lame in comparison to his. I wrote about bringing him Advil and a cold mask when he has a headache, always being supportive, and other niceties. He recited 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, my favorite passage. He won.

I told him I was rewriting them and he gave me the "I hope this doesn't involve that discipline stuff" look. Okay, maybe I was reading into it a little, but it was a strange look.

So now I would like to rewrite my vows, especially considering all that's changed in the past 6 months. I've got a start here, but could use your help in fleshing it out. Pretty please? I tried to include some guy references, since he was in the Navy and all.


Every day, I wake up and realize that I love you more than I did the day before. You are my constant. My rock. My everything. For this reason, I have chosen to rewrite my vows to you to reflect the changes of the past 10 years.

I vow to love you always. You are and have always been my partner in all things. We've done some amazing things in our time as a married couple. Your love for me is unfailing and without condition, even after all that I've put you through. My love for you will continue to grow with us. (does this sound okay?)

I vow to honor you always. You deserve nothing less than the respect you have earned by always being there for me, no matter how crazy I got. (need more here)

I vow to obey you. You are my Captain. I will follow your lead. You are my navigator. Where you go, I will also. (need more here)

I vow to help you, as God created Eve to help Adam, although I will not listen to snakes and try to feed you forbidden fruit. I am your XO. You will not be alone. (need more here)

I vow to submit to you, as is written in Ephesians 5:22-33.
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing[b] her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”[c] 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
I vow to be the best wife I can be (at least for the next 70 years). We've been through better and worse, richer and poorer (mostly poorer), and sickness and health. And we've come through these things with humor, trust, and bonding. (I need to get real sappy here to end)

I love you and always will. You are my everything, and I vow to be yours too.
As you can see, it needs some help. I'm on a short timeline here and will update it as suggestions come in and as my cogs start turning. Thank you in advance for your help!


  1. Wow, lilmisses, I think what you have is beautiful. The important thing is that it comes from your heart. Congratulations on your silver anniversary! In this age of quickie marriages/divorce you are to be commended! I'm not sure I'm a good enough writer to even attempt to give you any advice on writing your vows, but I'll give it some thought. I'm sure someone with impressive skills will be around soon to help you out. :) (((Hugs)))

    1. Oop, I guess 10th isn't silver is it? It's something though...guess I'll have to look it up..anyway it's an accomplishment :)

  2. Hi :)
    Is this vow renewal reading private or will there be other people attending?

    1. Well then......and how romantic :)
      I love it, just the way you have it. I wouldn't change a thing. The fact that they are your words is all that is important, it is the genuine words or the gesture that is important for him to hear. But.....knowing that it is private, means you can say whatever you want about anything, and know that it is only heard by him. I love that.
      Only you can whisper the things he needs to hear. Only you know his language of love. It is as individual, I think, as a fingerprint between couples.

      A while ago I thought it was sad that my husband never wrote me a love letter. I felt neglected, a little. I got thinking about who he is and I realized that he sends me a love letter all winter long.
      You see, we live in an area where there is a lot of deer - and I love them and worry about them when the snow is deep. So, knowing this, all winter Ian pails out grain to the deer and in such away that they come very near the house to eat. We get to watch them come in for feed in the late winter afternoons and it is the most beautiful thing. He does it for me, so I can watch them and be comforted by the fact that they have food, after all if it was just to feed them he would do it by the out buildings and not have to deal with all the deer poop in the drive.
      I realized in that moment, that it is a living love letter. Someone else doing it would be just putting out feed.
      Sorry if I got too sappy :)

    2. Your vows are beautiful :)

    3. I'm sorry, lilmisses, I shouldn't have included my own experience, I hope I didn't offend you. Sorry if I did.
      I thought your vows were lovely.

    4. Lillie ((hugs)) I'm not offended at all sweetie! I absolutely love your story. Sorry I didn't reply sooner. I forgot that I didn't and I have been buried in work and a sick little girl and a broke down car and singing at the women's gathering at church. It's been a crazy past couple of days. ((hugs))

    5. hugs back to you and your little one :)
      and thanks, that feels better, I was a little worried.... :)

  3. I think they are lovely Lil Misses. If you truly mean them and they come from your heart, whatever you write will be perfect.

    So sorry none of us are being much help, but I think you're doing great all on your own!

    1. Lol...Seems to be the consensus that's I'm on the right track. Thanks :)

  4. I think they are perfect as they are, too!!

  5. I'm hopeless at stuff like this unless it's my own but I think you are off to a great start!

  6. I still think what you have is beautiful, lilmisses. I don't think you need any help. But since you asked..... I did have a few words come to mind, feel free to delete after you have a good laugh! Hey, I tried.:)

    Ten years ago, I pledged to love and honor you. I thought I loved you then, but that was only the beginning of what I feel for you today. I never knew how deeply I could love someone. With every fiber of my being... You hold my heart and my very soul in your hands. I know they'll be safe there, and cherished, as they always have been.....

    1. Awww...that's so sweet Cowgirl! Thank you. ((hugs))