Thursday, October 11, 2012
Trust and Date Night Funnies
Yesterday was pretty crazy day. I had to clean out my car (under the seat where the kids sit) before I even got my day started. That was very VERY icky. Then we needed to meet for a workout session. I was five minutes late. Ugh...
After all that, it was time to go see my therapist. She's a pretty great woman. She's very smart. I don't think that I could've gotten through the past six months without her. But I also discovered something else. I could not have gotten through the past six months without Hubby willing to take on ttwd.
Ttwd has forced me to learn how to trust. It's not that I didn't trust Hubby. It's just that I didn't trust him deeply and completely. The amount of trust that it takes to submit myself, my bare bottom, to Hubby and his will is more that I ever thought I had in me. Even he was amazed at the level of trust I had for him.
It really is a testament to submission. If I can trust Hubby with my submissive heart fully, then I can trust him fully when crap hits the fan. When things go badly and I am in crisis, I know he is there for me. I know he will hold my hand through it. I know he will not abandon me. And I know he will always look out for what's best for me. I would not have known this had I not submitted to him to begin with.
My therapist, while she does not know about ttwd, she has noted marked improvement in my ability to cope with situations that involve a high level of stress. I've become a new woman. I may still be unfolding, but I am making progress. I believe that is what ttwd is all about. It's about being a better wife, a better mother, a better friend, and being able to be strong when life throws you a curve ball.
I paid for being late along with letting the gas tank get below 1/4. I was given another discounted spanking, although Hubby didn't see it that way. He's going at his own pace. He's not comfortable with the disciplinary aspect of ttwd. I'm sure he'll get there eventually. In the meantime, I'm left with mixed feelings about it.
He instructed me to pack a couple things. Gramom had the kids for the night and we weren't just going to stay at home. We were going to stay at a hotel on the beach! We had dinner and drinks. And then walked to a bar and had more drinks (If you are ever in Daytona Beach near the Bandshell, stop by the Mai Tai bar and ask for a Lava Flow with a Kraken float. You totally will not be disappointed).
I took notes throughout the night of things you could've heard as we talked (somewhat loudly at times) had you been eaves dropping.
Things said last night:
You know me, I like getting spanked.
So you want a holey paddle?
I can almost feel the embarrassment right now.
That Captain's word is law
Vows made in the storm are forgotten in calm water
Well that threat wiped the smile off your face!
-Poor Lillie had to do sit-ups for eating jelly beans.
-I like the way Ian thinks!
You ate Nemo's dad!
I need a momay (playing off of edemame)
Release the Kraken!!! (Actually said by both of us several times)
Aaaaaahhhhhgggggrrrrrrhhhhh!!! Bobcat Goldthwait circa 1992!
-What?! That's a big swirly mess??
-No. I said it was a big swing and a miss.
Polish manicure: you paint your nails and scrape the ends off. We could sell that sh*t! (Hubby is half Polish and quite funny)
There was so much more but alas, my phone ran out of juice and I didn't have my purse on me. We had a bit to drink. We both had a really good time. By the level of hangover this morning, I would say he more than me. Lol!
Hope your day is wonderful! ((hugs))